The Seed of Hope

Opportunities

When opportunity knocks is an old saying that basically conveys the message that we shouldn’t pass up a chance to improve ourselves or our situations in life. Could it also mean that we shouldn’t turn our backs on opportunities to help someone else?

Three months ago I was given the opportunity to lead a group of young ministry students from Highlands College in LIFE, a Bible study/life walk course. I accepted the invitation, and for the last nine Friday mornings I’ve had the blessing, honor, and privilege of doing exactly that.

Willingness and Obedience

About a month ago, I closed one of our meetings by assuring the guys that when it comes to serving the Lord, if you will walk with willingness and obedience in your heart, He will give you amazing opportunities to reach others for Him. In other words, be willing to take advantage of each and every opportunity to share with someone, even if doing so is a little out of your comfort zone. That’s where the obedience comes in.

“Be willing and obedient,” I urged them. “You’ll be amazed at the opportunities you’ll have to make a difference.”

Charlotte

That same weekend my wife Jackie and I hit the road for a weekend trip to Charlotte, North Carolina to attend a NASCAR race with a good friend who had excellent seats in a reserved area of the speedway.

We arrived at our hotel at 11:00 A.M. on Saturday, well ahead of check-in time of 3:00 P.M. Much to our surprise (and delight) our room was available and the gentleman at the hotel front desk graciously gave us the room key.

So there we were, sitting in Charlotte a full five hours before we were to meet our friend Scott and his father in the hotel lobby. Jackie commented that we had driven by a shopping mall on way in, thought that she might go and do a little shopping, and asked if I’d like to go.

At first I politely declined, telling Jackie that I’d just hang around in the room and watch some college football. Then I thought, “What the heck. We haven’t taken a weekend trip in a while, and I can watch football any time. I’m gonna spend some time with my wife.”

Robert

We wound up in Nordstrom’s, a huge department store located in the shopping center. Upon entering the store, Jackie made a beeline for women’s shoes (her favorite department) with me in tow.

As we entered the sprawling shoe area, four different salespersons approached Jackie to offer assistance. Her reply to each was a polite, “Thanks, but I’m just looking.”

The fifth salesperson, a young man in his twenties, walked right past Jackie towards me, and as he approached asked “And how are you today sir?”

“I’m awesome!” was my immediately reply. But then God nudged me a bit, and without missing a beat, I added, “Actually, I’m better than awesome. You see, I’m blessed and highly favored.”

What transpired during the following twenty minutes (during which Jackie tried in several pairs of boots) was a Spirit-filled and emotional conversation between a shoe salesman from Boston and a salon owner from Birmingham. We talked about God, Jesus, and ministries. We also promised to stay in touch.

Willingness + obedience = opportunity

Tuscaloosa

Nine days later, on a Monday night, I was given the opportunity to share my testimony with a group of teenagers at a Church of The Highlands campus in Tuscaloosa, which is about forty minutes south and east of Birmingham.

As with the Highlands College group, I urged this gathering of young people to walk with that same willingness and obedience, adding that “Sometimes we just have to get past ourselves and get out of the way to let God work through us.”

Dinner

The very next night Jackie and I had planned on taking Brooke (our live-in ministry student from Minnesota) and Cam (Brooke’s boyfriend who was visiting from Minnesota) out to dinner. It was Cam’s last night in town, and we wanted to do something special to cap off his visit.

At the last minute, and upon Cam’s suggestion, we decided to visit a nearby Japanese Hibachi grill that Jackie and I had been meaning to try for some time. If you’ve never experienced Hibachi cooking, it encompasses sitting around a huge flat-top grill as a chef prepares a meal for each person at the “table.” The entertainment value of watching the talented chef performing his craft is sometimes better than the food itself!

The four of us were flanked on the right by a mother and her high school aged daughter. To our left was a couple that was accompanied by their teenage son.

As the chef began preparing dinner, and as is so often the case, everyone at the table became engaged in one big laughter-filled conversation. At some point during our meal, the lady to our right asked if Brooke was our daughter. After chuckling a bit and proclaiming Brooke to be our sort-of-but-not-really-adopted-daughter, we explained why Brooke was with us. From that point on, the conversation turned to not only the ministry program, but to our church, and of course, to God.

When all of the food had been prepared and the chef had moved on to his next station, things quieted down a bit as we finished the last of our meal. It was during this time that the gentleman to our left said to no one in particular, “Hey, I’d really appreciate it if you guys would mention Nancy in your prayers.” (I won’t use her real name out of respect for her privacy)

As Nancy’s eyes began to fill with tears, her husband explained that Nancy had undergone a hysterectomy on the previous Thursday, and that while in surgery her physician noticed that her appendix didn’t look “quite right”, so they had removed it. They had just gotten the lab results back that afternoon, and the results weren’t so good; Nancy’s appendix, though contained, was malignant.

While Nancy’s husband was still talking, Brooke and I took a knowing look at one another. We both knew what was going to happen…

Prayer

After I had paid our check, I excused myself from the table to get something from the car that I wanted to give to Nancy. It was a small bracelet inscribed with Philippians 4:13:

I can do all things through Christ who strengthens me.

I stood outside the door of the restaurant, anxiously waiting for everyone to come out; I knew what I was gonna do, and I have to tell you that I wasn’t really comfortable with it.

Just as I had hoped, my threesome stepped out of the restaurant accompanied by Nancy, her husband, and her son. As they did, I nervously yet boldly walked up to Nancy and asked her to extend her hand. When she did, I slipped the bracelet onto her wrist and told her that it would serve as a reminder that with God all things are possible, and that with Jesus she could indeed beat the cancer that was in her body.

Nancy began to cry, and fighting even harder to maintain my composure, I turned to her husband and said, “You asked us to pray for Nancy. Well, how about right now?”

Still standing in front of Nancy, I took both of her hands in mine and stepped in closer. Everyone else formed a circle around us and put their hands on us. As they did so, I began to pray out loud for Nancy to be healed. At the same time, I was aware of the others praying too, and I could feel God’s Spirit with us. You see, He always shows up if you call on Him; even if it’s a small group of believers huddled up in prayer standing just outside the doors of a Japanese Hibachi steak house!

When we’d finished praying, we hung around for a few minutes in conversation. I don’t think that any of us wanted the moment to end. The feeling of God in and around us was palpable. Amazing. Humbling. Numbing. Filled with promise and hope.

Tonight.

As I type this, I don’t know if it is in God’s plans for Nancy to be cured of cancer. I told her husband that very thing. None of us knows what God has planned for us.

There’s one thing that I do know. God will give us opportunities to stand in the gap for someone and believe for them that with God all things, even healing cancer, is possible. We just have to act on those opportunities. That night, God gave us the opportunity to plant one small seed of hope in that family, and we made the most of it.

I can’t speak for Nancy and her family, but I feel safe in saying that it was a moment that Jackie, Brooke, Cam, or me will ever forget.

Be willing and obedient. You’ll be amazed at the opportunities you’ll have to make a difference.

FREAK

Webster defines a freak as “one that is markedly unusual or abnormal.”

I have to tell you that for the past three years I’ve considered myself to be a freak. Drawing on the values and guidelines for normalcy that had been instilled in me when I was growing up, there’s just not been much about me that I’ve considered to be normal.

Normal men don’t walk around wearing their hearts on their sleeves. Normal men aren’t as transparent as a window pane. Normal men don’t open their hearts, and all the junk that’s in them, to the world for everyone to see. Normal men don’t cry in the presence of strangers. Normal men don’t look for opportunities to share past mistakes, previous addictions, broken relationships, failures, and unmet life expectations with others. Normal men won’t stand on any street corner and openly profess their love for Jesus. Normal men wouldn’t give up a chance at a career with a global corporation because of a burning desire to share their faith in a business arena. Normal men aren’t totally blinded by their love for the Lord, putting everything else on the back burner to focus on Him.

Okay, so you may be thinking that the man I just described is normal in every way, and I totally respect your thoughts. The problem for me is that I don’t share the same sentiment, so whether looking at my reflection in the mirror, or reflecting on the state of my life, what I saw was a freak.

I didn’t mind being a freak. If I had, I could’ve chosen to live my life in a different way, but obviously I chose not to. I did question, from time to time, why God decided to “wire” me this way, and wondered if I’d ever meet another man like me. I was sure that I wasn’t the only one!

A Message.

A few weeks ago a good friend of mine forwarded a message to me titled Stepping into Your Truest Identity that had been given by a gentleman named Graham Cooke. You can find a snippet of Mr. Cooke’s message on YouTube if you so desire.

I’ve taken Mr. Cooke’s message, which focused on personalities, personas, the way we look at ourselves, the way that others see us, and the way that God sees us. I’ve dissected his message, examined it from every angle, and “fleshed it out” in my mind. What I offer you today are my own thoughts from Graham’s offering, and the insights that I’ve gained along the way.

Personality

The first thing I’d like to share my thoughts with you on is in regards to our personalities.

Some definitions of personality include:

          a: the quality or state of being of a person

          b: the complex of characteristics that distinguishes an individual

          c: distinction or excellence of personal and social traits

Our personalities are quite often in direct relation to what we think of ourselves, what others think of us, what we see when we look in the mirror, what we’ve brought forward from childhood in regards to learned behavior, and those invisible impressions that others have left on our lives.

Curiously enough, the negative behaviors and impressions seem to have the upper hand over the good ones. These include limitations and doubts of worthiness that have been planted in our minds not only by us, but by others as well. I’ll remind you that when we’re born we don’t know fear, anger, depression, doubt, prejudice, envy, shame, or any other emotion or mindset that is not of the Lord.

I believe that our personalities determine our walk in life. They set the table for who we are, what we are, what we do, and how we do it. Our personalities impact our relationships with others, with our own selves, and with God. Our personalities have a direct effect on our careers, on the choices we make, and believe it or not, on our destinies.

Persona

A persona is defined as “a personality that a person (as an actor) projects in public,” which is something that I can certainly identify with. For years, in my personal life, and in our business, the smile on my face hid the constant war that was raging within. As the front desk person in the salon that my wife Jackie and I owned and operated, I learned to be an actor. In my personal relationships I would never reveal what was in my heart, not even with my closest friends. Every once in a while I’d give Jackie a glimpse of what was going on inside, but I wouldn’t let her look for too long. I didn’t want her know how little I thought of myself.

Oh yeah. I can tell you all about that persona thing. I can tell you what was like to live a double life, wearing a smile on the outside while I was dying on the inside. I can tell you that living a lie every day only made matters worse, for me, for Jackie, for our family, and for those around me. I can tell you that my view of myself was so distorted that I could never imagine God’s view of me, that I am His child, that He loves me unconditionally, and that “…I am wonderfully and fearfully made.” Psalm 139:14

When we can see ourselves as God sees us, everything changes.

The gist of Graham Cooke’s message is that what’s most important isn’t the way we see ourselves, or the way that others see us, but the way God sees us and why He put us here.

Even as I was listening to his sermon, my mental wheels were spinning, and I was bombarding myself with questions!

What does God see in me? What do the heavens see me, Sam Maniscalco, as being on this earth? Why am I here? In a society consumed by a purpose-driven life, what is my purpose in life? Why am I this way? When God looks at me, what does He see?

The answers to my questions came immediately, and because I’m willing and open enough to share all of my thoughts with you, I’m going to do exactly that.

God sees me as a modern-day Paul the Apostle. Before you get in a huff, I’ll emphasize that I didn’t say that I am Paul reincarnate, but that God sees me as a modern-day Paul. I’m Sam Maniscalco, and I come equipped with my own visions, my own dreams, and my own set of baggage.

Unlike Paul, I never persecuted Christians, wasn’t knocked off a horse and blinded, haven’t been stoned, imprisoned, drug through the streets, or been involved in a shipwreck. (All for which I’m very grateful!) I’m not one of the great sources of the spreading of Christianity, and I’m quite sure that my humble offerings would never be included in The Bible, Part II!

But I do believe that God sees me as a modern-day Paul, and you know what? I see me that way too. And if nothing else, my belief explains everything.

It explains why I love to write and speak about God. It explains why enough is never enough. It explains why my life is an open book for all to see, and why I’ll share even my darkest secrets if doing so will help others. It explains why my love for God and for Jesus has blinded me to everything else. It explains why I don’t really care what others think of me, or the consequences of being so bold about my faith.

It explains why I’m a freak, and for the first time, I’m really okay with that. You see, for the first time in my life, what I’m wearing on the outside is exactly what I’m feeling on the inside, and I wouldn’t trade that for anything.

So, when God looks at you, what does He see?

...being fifty-nine.

Today is my fifty-ninth birthday. Fifty-nine.

Notice that I didn’t finish the sentence with an exclamation point. That doesn’t mean that I’m not excited about celebrating another birthday.

Notice that I didn’t use a question mark. That’s because I question neither the date of my birth, nor my age.

Notice that I didn’t add a “frowny face” to the end of the statement. That’s because from where I’m standing, being fifty-nine doesn’t look nearly as old as it did when I was twenty-nine, or thirty-nine, or even forty-nine.

My announcement that today is my birthday ended, quite simply, with a period.

Exclamation points (!) are used to convey excitement or a strong feeling about a particular subject. Quite often they’re used to indicate something of significance.

Question marks (?) are used at the end of a sentence to ask a direct question, or in referencing something that’s unknown, uncertain, or unknowable.

Strings of characters (X#@*!?) are often used in comic strips to convey frustration or anger.

Frowny faces (L), as I like to call them, are used to depict sadness or disappointment.

What’s the symbol?

Yesterday I received an early birthday greeting from a dear friend that I’ve known since school days…

Hey Sam,

Hope you enjoy your Birthday! You know that birthdays are a gift from God, so what I possibly give you top that?!? Love you, Mary Jane

Mary Jane couldn’t have been more spot-on with her message to me, and I agree with her 100%! (Did you notice that Mary Jane used question marks and an exclamation point to convey her emotions?)  

In my heart, the gift reaches well beyond my birthday. You see, it’s not just birthdays that are gifts from God, but every day that He gives me here on this earth. No, I don’t think that way because I’m fifty-nine. I don’t believe that my days are numbered, or that “the end” is near.

The truth is that I appreciate every day, not only because of where I am, but because of where I’ve been….

Before I began writing this post, I scanned the keyboard on this laptop looking for the symbol for gratitude. The closest thing that I could think of for expressing gratitude is a happy face (J), but it denotes happiness. I was looking for something that, in essence, captures the gratitude that fills my heart each day. No such luck. What I’m left with are, quite fittingly, my thoughts expressed through my words.

Reflections

Aside from going to church and attending a meeting on Sunday, and doing some bookwork yesterday, I spent the last two days listening to worship music and reflecting on the fifty-nine years that preceded today. That’s a lot of territory to cover!

In doing so, I divided my life into the six decades that I’ve been around, and revisited a lot of “Kodak moments” in each of those decades. I won’t bother you with details, but I will tell you that each decade had its share of pride and shame, good and bad decisions, highs and lows, successes and failures, dreams and disappointments, and of course, affairs of the heart that brought love, joy, happiness, hurt, and pain.

Given the opportunity, I wouldn’t trade or change the events of my life in any of those decades. I am the direct result of all that I’ve been through, both good and bad. I’m of the firm belief that God has orchestrated those events, and that He has me right where He wants me!

That being said, I can honestly tell you that none of the previous five decades can hold a candle to the one that I’m in right now. This one is the best. This one is the one where it all came together, where the pieces of the puzzle finally fit. You see, this one is the decade that marked the beginning of my real relationship with a real God.

Without Him, there was never enough happiness, or love, or peace of mind, or money, or possessions, or satisfaction, or any of the things that I never could seem to get enough of. Today, I lack for none of those.

Here’s the thing: I don’t have more money or possessions, but I have enough. I have been blessed with happiness, love, peace of mind, and satisfaction because God’s presence, in the Father, the Son, and the Holy Spirit, has changed my perspective in life and filled in all of the gaps.

Gratitude

I’ll close today by summing up my thoughts on this, my 20,454^th day of life on this earth…

I’m grateful for my life. I’m grateful for my wife, my family, and my friends. I’m grateful for our business. I’m grateful for my pastor, my church, and my church family. I’m grateful for the things that I get to do to serve God’s Kingdom. I’m grateful that His plans included me. I’m grateful for Jesus and for the sacrifice that He made for you and me. Above all else, I’m grateful for God and His presence in my life. I’m just grateful.

This has indeed been a great, grateful-filled, fifty-ninth birthday.